“Cancelled” or “#MeToo” OCD
OCD and MeToo: the Fastest Rising Theme of our Time
At some point in your life you’ve probably had some misconceptions about OCD. One idea you might have been that having OCD means being obsessed with cleanliness and handwashing. Interestingly, there’s a reason behind this stereotype. Folks with OCD often struggle with tolerating uncertainty, so when they become aware of a nebulous threat, their OCD theme will sometimes latch on to it. Folks began to gain more awareness about OCD in the 80’s just around the time of the HIV/AIDS crisis. For years, knowledge on how the virus was contracted and spread was unknown and the concept was replete with rumors and misinformation. For many of those with OCD, their themes latched on to this fear and they developed contamination themed OCD. It’s my hypothesis that around the time that society developed an increased awareness of OCD, contamination themed OCD was the most prevalent theme.
I’ve noticed a similar trend amongst the patients I’ve treated in the past five years. One of the most impactful movements on our collective conscious in the past decade has been the #metoo movement. This movement calls upon society to legitimize survivors of sexual assault and hold those who commit these assaults accountable. As a result of this movement, some prominent figures have been “cancelled”, which is to say that as actions that they have taken to infringe upon the rights, comfort, and safety of others were revealed, there was a collective move to reject these figures and their work. When a person becomes cancelled they often lose their job, their friends, and sometimes even their family.
While the movement has garnered widespread support, many folks with OCD have noticed their fears latching on to the threat of being cancelled. The specifics of this theme have changed a bit over time. Around the time of #metoo many of my clients had obsessive fears that they had or would sexually harass another individual and become rejected by everyone around them. Some of these clients would obsessively review past experiences, such as parties or dates, to try to ensure that they hadn’t violated other’s boundaries. Others would hold their hands by their sides when around peers to ensure they wouldn’t impulsively reach out and harass someone. Yet others would try to block out, prevent, or obsessively analyze their intrusive thoughts around harassing people.
Since then, I have noticed more variations of this theme, with subsequent rises in fears of saying, thinking or doing something racist, sexist, transphobic, or homophobic. Clients may fear that they will commit an impulsive inappropriate action, that they have posted something on social media that will be (mis)construed as inappropriate, or that they have an opinion that is “known” to be unacceptable to everyone except for themselves. They will often review past, present, and future for signs that they will be rejected by those around them.
How is this treated?
Trick question! If you’ve read my article about OCD themes, you’ve already learned that all OCD themes are treated with the same principles, and this theme is no different. The goal of therapy is to help the client learn how to make decisions based on their own goals and values, rather than being controlled by an obsessive fear. In this case, the client learns how to tolerate the uncertainty that they may have or will do something that will result in them being rejected by everyone around them. Behavioral exposures include posting on social media, having conversations, and attending events to the degree that the client determines they would normally do if they didn’t have OCD. Imaginal exposures include tolerating the uncertainty that there will always be a possibility the client has or will do something that will get themselves cancelled.
I have found those with this theme to be just as treatable as any other, but there is one barrier to treatment that is common to this theme and worth mentioning. Sometimes prospective clients will delay seeking treatment for fear of revealing the content of their thoughts or actions to a clinician. The fear of getting confirmation that they are a terrible person keeps them away from therapy and stuck in the vortex of anxious thoughts in their mind. Of course once the client commits to bringing up their concerns in treatment the OCD can finally be worked on and they can start to live more peaceful and healthier lives. If you see yourself within this text I urge you to delay no further in getting the therapy you deserve.